Monday, August 25, 2008

Back to the grindstone!

Well the kids started back to school today. I have 130 students this year so far. I know this number will fluctuate all year. I have some talkers in a couple of my classes. I will definitely have to keep a tight leash on those classes, but overall I think it will be a great year! We are doing lots of new things this year and I'm very excited about it.

Nathan and I are going to "Try" again this week to get pregnant. We are saving money as fast as we can to do the IUI. He wants to try it first. My doctor says that if I can get pregnant that will help with the "possible" endometriosis. Who knows. I don't know what to believe anymore!

Wish us babydust!


Sunday, August 17, 2008

Extremely Random and Hurting

Vacation was wonderful. I go back to work tomorrow. It really stinks! I worked in my classroom for a combined 10 hours on Thursday and Friday. It's almost completely ready to go!

I'm not pregnant again, but I really wasn't surprised. I didn't even cry. Go figure. After almost 2 years of being disappointed each and every month, I guess you just get used to it. Next month will be 2 years since we miscarried the twins. We are currently saving money and praying about when to do the IUI. I'm still not sure if I should do the surgery first. Any thoughts?

My life has been pure crap since April. My uncle died unexpectedly. Then, last Saturday my great uncle died on my mom's side of the family. Last night, my aunt died. I'm just wondering when all of the crap is gonna stop happening to our family. I feel like ever since I started teaching crap has happened each year.

Let's examine more closely:
1st year: my Grandfather dies, my husband donates kidney to my dad, my dad has a pancreas transplant somehow gets a mysterious fungus and almost dies not once, but twice

2nd year: a very crappy year at school. principal is hateful. other teachers are running the school instead of the principal.

3rd year: miscarriage, MIL has heart attack, I began going into depression
We move twice-once to live with the in-laws for 4 months until our house was completed, and then finally into our new house.

4th year: grandmother gets remarried (wasn't sure about this at the time, but it's ok now), uncle passes, diagnosed with possible endometriosis

5th year (hasn't even started yet--starts tomorrow): Great uncle dies, Aunt dies (she's much better off now--has been sick for a VERY long time)

See what I mean? It's been pure crap. But the good news is I know God has a plan for all of this stuff. He brought me out of my depression thanks to Caleb Ministries counseling at church. My husband and I are a lot closer now than we've ever been before. I look at the world through different eyes than I used to. I used to look at the world through rose colored glasses. Now I see that bad things do happen to good people. It's unfair, but it's life. I love getting to read all of your blogs. When you become pregnant or have babies, I smile. I'm so happy for all of you. When you miscarry or are not pregnant yet again, I'm sad for you. Your joy is my joy. Your pain is my pain. I've been there, so I know how much it hurts. One day I hope to experience the joy that several of you have or are experiencing. Keep my family in your prayers as we have the receiving of friends tomorrow night and the funeral on Tuesday.

Please continue to pray for N and me. We just don't know what to do. Once we raise the money for the IUI, we don't want to jump right on it unless it's the right time. We don't want to blow the money. We're definitely not made out of money; I'm a teacher and N's a youth pastor. Clearly we are not loaded! Barely making it most months. N took another job just to help with the saving part.

Wow that was a completely random post. I did not know all of that was going to come out of me! Sorry. But if you made it this far, I hope you will pray for us!

Friday, August 1, 2008

On Vacation!

My hubby and I are officially on Vacation until next Saturday. We'll be lying on the beach and playing in the ocean! I can't wait to leave in the morning. Hopefully this will help get my mind off of the 2WW. We are still unsure whether to start IUI next cycle or wait...just waiting on God to show us what He wants us to do! Blessings!